Thoughts

I just realized how retarded it must be for me to write this whole blog in English when I'm freaking Romanian. 

I feel very sad and i don't know why. A relative of mine just died but it's not that. That made me start thinking more about death and about my family and friends. If I were to die tomorrow my life would have been in vain. I haven't done anything important in my life. I would only leave a  vague trace in people's mind. Tomorrow my relative is being buried but I can't go and watch her like that..so lifeless. People will be crying everywhere; it's such a sad view. 

Instead I'm going to my friend's house to watch a movie or something. That also makes me sad, because I feel like I'm doing the wrong thing. The fact that we didn't invite Diana makes me feel kinda bad because I started this whole thing with her but I can't help feeling the way I feel towards her. I know the things I say make her sad but I can't stop saying them even though I try. I just want to end this friendship because I KNOW I don't care about her anymore. It's just that I don't know why. Whoa it feels goos letting it all out. :) I just hope my IP teacher doesn't know English.